Starting to write a novel, yet again

Everyone with even a tiny interest in writing harbours in himself / herself a secret desire to write a novel. This desire, even though dormant, for most of the time, bursts out every now and then and makes us, the writers, sit down and scribbling down the very idea we stumble upon that day.

We do this in a moment of passion, our words making love with the pages, a fountainhead burst open and spilling out in different colors of our imagination, in various shades of our memories.

But these moments are fleeting, not unlike the life of a firefly, that fizzles out in few minutes. And soon we stare at the page with nothing more than a blank gaze to offer, our mind feeling like an empty tumbler, drained out and dry.

I have done this a lot of times. And now realizing the pattern, also skip a few times, fully aware of the lure that these moments of inspiration offer.

But today, when I again started to write a novel, but in a way unlike before, because of the advice and tutelage I got from ‘her,’ I realized that it can be done, sans those moments of inspiration.

In ‘her’ guidance I found a way to write it – not a cheesy shortcut – but a real way that makes a novel possible which gives you the direction to look in the right places for writing a novel.

And I have started looking at them, for a couple of weeks now, and so when I sat today for writing the first words of the story, I realized that it can be done.

But knowing the way is a double edged sword.

For now I have realized that how long this journey is going to be. How lonely and difficult. How much it would demand from me, my time, my attention, my everything. It would stop at nothing less than taking my entire life for at least a year – and even more – if it comes to that.

Now the choice is clear – to drop the idea of a novel and focus on my nine-to -six five-times-in-a-week day job that is comfortable and easy and without too much effort. Or …

Or.. I drown myself into this endeavour and start.. .and everytime thi choice comes, keep on opting for the latter, and this choice will come often.. sometimes every moment of my waking life…